This narrative, told in first person, captures the recollections and reflections of Clarke Byard, cofounder of The Byard Family Legacy Fund, as shared during a personal conversation. The original discussion has been carefully edited for both clarity and conciseness, providing a faithful yet refined account of her experiences and insights.
When I first met Kevin, we were both navigating the uncertain social terrain of tenth grade. He had just transferred to our school, the quintessential new kid trying to find his footing, while I was deeply immersed in my passion for dance. At that time, our lives ran on parallel tracks — mine filled with rehearsals, performances, and the thrill of the stage; his consumed by early-morning practices and the physical demands of joining the football team. Over time, however, our separate circles began to overlap naturally, and what started as casual friendship soon deepened into something more meaningful. We began dating, discovering a connection built on admiration, youthful excitement, and an unspoken understanding of each other’s ambitions.
By the time junior year arrived, we faced our first real test as a couple. Kevin was wholly devoted to improving his athletic performance, planning to spend the entire summer at football training camps. I, on the other hand, longed for a traditional teenage summer together — filled with unhurried days, friends, and shared adventures. Ultimately, I ended the relationship, frustrated by the imbalance between his dream and our time together. Yet, fate seemed to have other plans. When senior year rolled around, we found our way back to one another, wiser and more appreciative of what we had. From that point forward, our bond endured through every challenge and every transition. More than fifteen years later, we remain each other’s constant — partners in life, officially united in marriage since 2018.
After high school, our individual paths led us to different states yet remained intertwined by mutual respect and unwavering commitment. Kevin pursued college football in Tennessee, dedicating himself to a sport that demanded discipline, sacrifice, and resilience. I attended Howard University in Washington, D.C., immersing myself in academics, cultural growth, and self-discovery. Surprisingly, the physical distance between us became a source of strength. It allowed both of us the independence to flourish within our own pursuits while maintaining the solid foundation of our relationship. Upon graduation, however, I faced a difficult decision: remain in Washington to further my professional goals or relocate to Tennessee to build a shared life with Kevin. I understood clearly that choosing Kevin meant embracing not only him but also the unpredictable rhythms and relocations of a football career.
Ultimately, I moved to Tennessee, and together we built a home — a steady anchor amid the hectic world of professional sports. Some people have compared life as the spouse of an NFL player to that of a military partner, and while I recognize certain parallels — such as abrupt relocations, emotional endurance, and long periods of separation — I also acknowledge the stark differences. My grandfather served in the military, and I know firsthand that the level of physical risk and uncertainty in that life is of a wholly different magnitude. Still, like military families, I realized that I could not hold a traditional job, since any moment might bring an unexpected move if Kevin were traded or reassigned to another team.
Now, years later, Kevin is in his tenth NFL season, a remarkable milestone that reflects both his dedication and our family’s adaptability. We are parents to three spirited children: Eliana, who is six; Kevin IV, who is four; and Amari, our two-year-old. Despite his demanding schedule, Kevin remains a profoundly engaged father. He is the kind who insists on bedtime routines, school drop-offs when possible, and spontaneous playtime in the backyard. One of our most extraordinary family moments came during the birth of our second child, when labor progressed far more rapidly than expected. Kevin ended up delivering our son right at home, a memory that still leaves us both in awe. After such an unforgettable experience, naming him after his father felt only natural — almost inevitable.
Although both of us were born and raised in Georgia, Tennessee has become the heart of our family’s story. It is where Kevin honed his talent, began his professional journey, and where we planted lasting roots. We own a home there and are surrounded by a community grounded in shared experience — neighbors, friends, and mentors, many of them former professional athletes and their families, who understand the balance between public performance and private life.
Our stability in Tennessee, however, now coexists with mobility. When Kevin signed with the Chicago Bears last season, the practical question arose of whether the children and I should stay behind or relocate for the duration of the season. Initially, I opted to remain in Tennessee, even hiring a nanny to help maintain routine and consistency for the kids. Yet distance proved harder than anticipated. The children longed for their father’s presence, and he equally missed their laughter, their little milestones, and even the daily chaos of family life. Eventually, we decided to rent a home in Chicago during football season so we could all be together.
Maintaining educational continuity under such circumstances is no small feat. We pay full-time tuition at the children’s private school in Tennessee because entry is highly competitive, and we do not want to lose their enrollment spots. At the same time, Eliana also attends a private school in Chicago while we live there, ensuring academic consistency wherever we go. Balancing institutions in two states is logistically demanding and financially significant, but it provides our children stability as their world shifts between two homes.
I anticipate that this arrangement will become even more complex as our children grow older and their roots in Tennessee deepen — socially, academically, and emotionally. They already miss their friends, familiar extracurricular activities, and the comfort of home, yet our close-knit community helps bridge that gap. Many of our Tennessee friends visit us in Chicago, keeping connections strong and reminding us that distance does not have to diminish belonging.
One of the most meaningful dimensions of this lifestyle has been the support network among NFL spouses and partners. When I was new to this world, several seasoned wives took me under their wing, guiding me through the unique challenges of being both a partner and a mother in the midst of an unpredictable season. Over time, I have learned to embrace the constant movement, the changes, and even the chaos. Fighting against it only leads to stress, whereas accepting it allows me to focus on gratitude and the remarkable opportunities that this life offers.
Now that I am more experienced, I strive to extend that same mentorship to others. During home games, the kids and I attend together, forming part of a lively community where children of players laugh, play, and cheer alongside one another. Recently, a younger wife, who is expecting twins, reached out to me for advice on how to balance it all. I smiled and told her, with genuine understanding, “I’ve got you.” Supporting other women in this environment is one of the most rewarding aspects of my role.
Although I help run our family’s philanthropic foundation, I am at peace dedicating most of my time to our home and children during these formative years. I often see newer wives and girlfriends feel pressured to juggle countless responsibilities — careers, household management, social obligations — all at once. Personally, I no longer measure fulfillment by how many roles I can perform simultaneously. Instead, I value the freedom to be present, knowing that this phase of life is fleeting and precious.
To better manage everything, I have begun exploring ways to streamline daily responsibilities. Adopting a structured schedule has proven vital to maximizing the limited moments we share when Kevin is home. Using a digital calendar system, I can send him notifications before the kids’ events — small reminders that help him participate whenever possible, even if only for a brief appearance. With his workdays stretching until roughly six in the evening and bedtime arriving by seven-thirty, every hour together counts. On rare Fridays off, we seize the chance for family outings — a movie night, a seasonal trip to the pumpkin patch, or simply an evening of laughter at home.
Recently, I began experimenting with outsourcing tasks, hiring a babysitter to lend an extra pair of hands. I’ve even considered bringing in an au pair to provide consistent support, though as an only child, I find the idea of sharing my living space full-time with someone new a bit daunting. Still, I recognize that lightening my load can create room for more meaningful moments with the children and smoother family routines overall.
At the end of the day, my deepest contentment comes from being present in the simple, irreplaceable experiences of motherhood — witnessing bedtime giggles, sharing morning breakfasts, and savoring all the fleeting wonders of their early years. Those moments are the fabric of our family life, the ones I will cherish long after Kevin’s playing career has ended and the stadium lights have dimmed.
Sourse: https://www.businessinsider.com/clarke-byard-chicago-bears-parenting-during-nfl-season-2025-11
