There exist two deceptively simple words that Mark Parthemer, a seasoned professional in the field of wealth management, recognizes as signals that his work is about to become significantly more nuanced and demanding: “blended family.” As the chief wealth strategist at Glenmede, a highly regarded financial management and investment firm, Parthemer devotes his expertise to guiding clients through the intricate processes of estate planning and legacy design.
Traditionally, the transfer of wealth has followed a straightforward trajectory—from parents to their biological children, passing from one generation to the next within a cohesive family unit. This conventional model has formed the philosophical and legal foundation for estate planning for centuries. Yet, in today’s society, where families often include stepchildren, multiple marriages, divorces, remarriages, and adult offspring from different relationships, that once-clear inheritance path can quickly become entangled. The introduction of blended family dynamics introduces overlapping loyalties and competing interests that make the process exponentially more delicate.
“These situations,” Parthemer observes, “involve complex human dynamics that call for exceptional diplomatic skill, emotional intelligence, and a comprehensive, big-picture perspective.” He stresses that events such as marriage, divorce, or remarriage—whether they involve the family’s patriarch or matriarch or their adult children—must always be considered integral factors within any estate plan.
Donna Cates, a certified divorce financial analyst and founder of Money Matters Wealth Solutions, echoes this sentiment. She notes that many families instinctively shy away from frank discussions about finances surrounding relationships because they perceive such conversations as awkward, uncomfortable, or somehow unromantic. Yet Cates insists that, paradoxically, facing these topics directly is one of the most genuinely caring and protective gestures a family can make. “Addressing the financial realities of marriage and divorce,” she states, “is not an act of cold pragmatism; rather, it is an expression of long-term love and foresight.”
Financial experts agree that the first step toward protecting a family’s wealth—especially in a blended family structure—is to start with a clear understanding of one’s ultimate goals. Parthemer calls this strategic approach “beginning with the end in mind.” In practical terms, it means defining the legacy you wish to leave—what you want your wealth to accomplish for those you love both during your lifetime and after your passing—and then designing all financial decisions to serve that goal. For instance, you might wish for your surviving spouse to have financial security and even allow for remarriage, but you may also want to ensure that any funds intended for your children or grandchildren remain protected from unintended beneficiaries such as future partners or step-relations. In such a scenario, experts suggest creating distinct allocations within your estate plan, such as setting aside a specific sum for your spouse while safeguarding the remainder in trusts earmarked for direct descendants.
For those still in the early stages of building a family, Parthemer advises taking an even more proactive stance through a prenuptial agreement. A prenup, he explains, is more than just a legal instrument—it is a documented understanding that defines what property will remain separate and what will be shared in the event of a marriage or divorce. Although many couples still view prenups as unromantic, they are, in fact, an essential tool for ensuring clarity and fairness, especially when planning for the distribution of inherited wealth. By clearly stating that inherited assets are not to be treated as marital property, such agreements prevent these assets from being subject to division if a divorce occurs.
Without a prenup, however, complications can arise swiftly. Cates recounts one illustrative case in which a family matriarch left a beloved beach house to her daughter. The daughter and her husband enjoyed the property together and even monetized it by renting it out. Yet after their divorce, the husband successfully claimed partial ownership of the home. Although the mother’s intention had been for her daughter alone to inherit the property, the act of commingling its use and revenue during the marriage rendered it partially marital property in the eyes of the law.
Surprisingly, only about fifteen percent of married Americans have signed a prenuptial agreement, according to a 2022 survey. However, acceptance of such instruments is steadily growing, with roughly forty-two percent of Americans expressing support for them. Experts attribute this shift to the painful knowledge gained from personal or familial experiences of divorce, where hard-earned or inherited wealth has been dissipated. Libby Leffler, founder and CEO of First—an online platform that specializes in simplifying the prenup process—emphasizes that many individuals now recognize that a divorce can dismantle not only emotional bonds but also financial legacies carefully cultivated over generations.
Interestingly, Leffler notes that it is not only young couples preparing for their first marriage who are seeking this protection. Increasingly, it is members of the older generation—parents or grandparents—who contact her firm to learn how their adult children can create prenuptial agreements, or even to protect themselves before entering a second or late-life marriage. In parallel, younger generations often encourage their parents to do the same, demonstrating a shift toward open communication and financial transparency across age groups. Although some older individuals still associate prenups with mistrust or taboo, millennials and members of Generation Z tend to regard them as standard elements of responsible financial planning. “We’re witnessing a genuine cultural transition,” Leffler explains, “in which discussions about money and contracts are becoming normalized rather than stigmatized.”
For individuals who marry without a prenup but later receive an inheritance, Cates offers an important caution: pause before spending or integrating those funds into joint marital finances. Instead, seek immediate guidance from an attorney and a trusted wealth advisor. At that point, a postnuptial agreement—essentially a prenup drafted after marriage—can serve to protect inherited assets in the same way a prenup would have beforehand. Cates clarifies that, under most legal frameworks, inherited property is not automatically considered marital property. Nevertheless, once those funds are mingled with joint accounts or used for shared expenses, such as home renovations or family vacations, they may lose their protected status. Her earlier beach house example stands as a cautionary tale of how good intentions without legal precautions can inadvertently erode generational wealth.
Finally, Parthemer emphasizes that even for families unable to dictate whether their children or grandchildren establish prenups themselves, there remains a strategic alternative he refers to as a “stealth prenup.” Despite its name, this instrument involves no secrecy or deception. Rather, it consists of structuring an estate plan so that future inheritances are automatically safeguarded against disputes, divorces, or creditors. The central mechanism typically involves placing assets in an irrevocable, fully discretionary trust. In such arrangements, distributions are governed entirely by the trustee’s discretion, with no guaranteed entitlements for beneficiaries. As a result, since the beneficiaries themselves hold no direct ownership rights to the funds, creditors—or even ex-spouses—cannot claim them. This multilayered approach not only protects wealth but also spares younger family members from difficult or emotionally charged prenup negotiations in the future.
As Parthemer summarises, the preservation of wealth in modern, complex family systems depends on foresight, structure, and open dialogue. Whether through direct legal agreements like prenups and postnups, or through more subtle protections such as trusts, families can ensure that their financial legacies endure with integrity and fairness across generations.
Sourse: https://www.businessinsider.com/how-to-protect-estate-inheritance-prenup-postnup-stealth-prenup-2025-11
